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With all
the major issues in the news lately, the
one that has overwhelmingly captured the
interest of the media and the public is:
“Did Tiger Woods’ wife beat the snot out
of him with a 9-iron, or was it another
club?” I’ve searched all over the
newspapers, the Internet and the Florida
Highway Patrol report, but I can’t find
anything that actually specifies what
club she was using when she chased him
down their driveway. You’d think the
accident investigator would include such
a vital piece of information in his
report. The officer did mention that she
was brandishing an iron rather than a
wood, but that was all he said.
A number
of columns dedicated to golf and duffers
alluded to a 9-iron, but that’s probably
because it’s widely known in golfing
circles that the 9-iron has the right
heft and balance to be most effectively
swung by an outraged woman bent on
grievous bodily harm.
Don’t
misunderstand me; I’m not accusing the
golf champ in any way of being guilty of
consorting with floosies while attending
golf tournaments away from home. Even
though women are coming out of the
woodwork claiming to have had flings
with him, I have no evidence that they
are telling the truth.
The only
thing that makes me think the Tiger may
be up to something is what he wrote in
his blog: “I have let my family down and
I regret those transgressions with all
of my heart. I have not been true to my
values and the behavior my family
deserves. I am not without faults and I
am far short of perfect. I am dealing
with my behavior and personal failings
behind closed doors with my family.
Those feelings should be shared by us
alone…..Personal sins should not require
press releases and problems within a
family shouldn't have to mean public
confessions…..I will strive to be a
better person and the husband and father
that my family deserves. For all of
those who have supported me over the
years, I offer my profound apology.”
Despite
what he says here, this sounds exactly
like a pubic confession. If I were he, I
would shut up.
Like a
number of politicians in the news of
late, Tiger may have been under the
impression that he could get away with
something in this day and age, even with
tabloid journalists and photographers
lurking in the shadows day and night.
The problem with being placed on a
pedestal, as Tiger has been, is that
there are always people trying to knock
you off of it.
It is
rumored that stories in the tabloids,
claiming Tiger had been “carrying on,”
is what he and his wife were discussing
prior to her attempting to “rescue him”
with the golf club—at two-thirty in the
morning.
Miz Woods,
also known as Elin Nordegren, a former
Swedish model, still goes by her maiden
name. According to Nicole Merkle,
writing in the Dallas Examiner scandal
sheet, “In light of the Tiger Woods
scandal, Mrs. Woods has been able to
renegotiate the terms of her prenuptial
agreement. According to various reports,
Elin Nordegren Woods stands to gain $80
million from Tiger Woods should their
marriage disintegrate after 7 years.
Elin's only got 2 more years with Tiger
Woods before she hits that bankroll.”
So was the
marriage for true love or did Tiger shop
for the prettiest wife money could buy?
Most men don’t have prenuptial
agreements. We court our future spouses
on the basis of their looks,
personalities, their abilities to cook,
keep house, raise the babies, slop the
hogs or tote a sack of feed.
I hope
that Woods is innocent and that it’s all
just a big misunderstanding. That’s what
I hope, but not necessarily what I
believe. In any event, perhaps he has
learned a lesson from this scandal and
will in future, stay away from
temptation.
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